Friday, June 22, 2007

The Five Second Rule

Have you ever wondered what three pounds of Jelly Bellys looks like if you drop the container on the kitchen floor? Me neither. But trust me, three pounds is a lot of beans.

Most people I know adhere to some form of the Five Second Rule: you know, if you drop food on the floor, but you pick it up within five seconds, it's still good. Around here, we generally follow this rule more of necessity than by choice. If you drop food on the floor and don't pick it up within five seconds, a dog will get it, and the choice is no longer yours. Sophie is enjoying the beans I missed under the edge of the cabinets.


So here's the dilemma.

The beans that are still in the container never touched the floor. They are, by any standard, uncontaminated, and they pose no moral or dietary question. The small pile of beans on the right is clearly contaminated. These are the beans I fished out from under the refrigerator, or behind the door, or the ones that had an unacceptable amount of visible dog hair stuck to them. They are already in the trash.

But the pile on the left is causing me some trouble. These are the beans I picked up off the middle of the floor (which happened to be freshly vacuumed, but not mopped), away from the edges of the cabinets and refrigerator, where all things hairy and disgusting tend to accumulate. I can attest to the fact that they were not licked by the dogs, because they were within my sight at all times from the moment they hit the floor until the moment I scooped them up and placed them on the counter. They do not have any visible dog hair or other identifiable ickiness on them. To truly understand my dilemma, you must also understand that I love Jelly Bellys with an unreasonable passion, and that they are not cheap, as candy goes. Also, this was a brand new four pound container (oh, yeah, like you've never downed an entire package of Oreos at one sitting), and only about a pound now remains in the container.

So what do you think? Does the five second rule apply, or have I revealed a truly alarming lack of gustatory discretion and personal hygiene?

12 comments:

Kristin said...

i would not eat anything off my kitchen floor but i never clean it. if it isn't going to stress you out, then eat them and enjoy them!!

sophanne said...

5 SECOND rule? I thought it was a 5 minute rule. Clearly in the case of jellybellys, it must be. What's a little dog hair among friends-or else all the more reason not to share so much. I wouldn't think twice-

What a great picture-and you have a Sophie too. Sometimes our Sophie is Sophina, Sophalina and Sophiegirl- just as our Annabelle is Annabellum Stinkysmellum.

uberstrickenfrau said...

EAT 'EM. I remember this interveiw where Brooke Sheilds was talking about how even if she found a candy bar on the street she would eat it. I kinda quit hating her so much after that.

knottykitty said...

Well, they DO have that kinda slick-like coating on the outside, so it's like there's no crevices for the germs to stick, so I would vote that the left pile is okay to eat. As for the hair-blended pile...at your own risk! Once hair is involved, I'm out! :p

Quail Hill Knits said...

Obviously you have never toured a candy factory with cub scouts....trust me, your floor is far cleaner that the place they were manufactured.

Maureen said...

I'm with knottykitty - the left pile's good for the taking, but the right pile....well....any food (jelly bellies are considered food aren't they) just starts up my gag reflex.

5elementknitr said...

Of COURSE the 5 second rule applies!! If there's any question, put the floor beans in a dish and keep them separate from the jar beans. See which ones go faster.

Romi said...

Dude. In this case, I think the ten minute rule applies. Floor is clean. Dog didn't get them. So what's the issue?! :)

Bea said...

As long as you've spotted them in 5 seconds, it's ok, you don't actually have to pick them up, because once you've spotted them, you can prevent further contamination. I would totally eat them, in fact, I would have been eating them as I was picking them up :)

Sarah said...

I say, dust off the dog hair and give 'er.

Life's a Stitch said...

I saw a show that proved the 5 second rule wrong. The smae amount of bacteria is on an item in five seconds as it is in one second. On the other hand I have an allergist who feels we would all be healthier, if at birth, we were put in the middle of the floor with the dogs. Me? I'm too practical not to subscribe to the 5 second rule. And I like Jelly Bellys way too much to let them go to waste. Especailly the red ones. And the pear ones. And...

Li

kmkat said...

The ones on the left are pristine, in my view. The ones on the right aren't, but who cares, they're Jelly Bellies, for God's sake! The universe's gift to us! Spread 'em on some paper towels, rub 'em with another paper towel, and they're good to go. So what's the problem?

I bet you were the kind of mom who, when the pacifier fell out of kidlet's mouth onto the floor, picked it up, wiped it on her jeans, held it up to the light to be sure she got all -- or at least most -- of the dog/cat hair off it, and stuck it back in baby's mouth. I know I was.