Friday, October 30, 2009

Bad Hair Day

Today I added a new entry to my all-time Top Five List of Things I Never Want to Hear:

"Oh my God! What was I thinking? I must have completely spaced on your style while I was cutting your hair!"

I'll just give you a moment to let that soak in.

I had my hair cut the day before yesterday. When I left the salon, it looked a little...different. But it wasn't until I got home and took a good look in the mirror that I realized my stylist had been channeling Carol Brady, circa 1975. Do you remember that little bob with the mullet sticking out the bottom? I didn't, either, until I saw it on my head.

We went to Disneyland yesterday for my husband's birthday, and I spent the whole day trying to shake my too-long side bangs out of my eyes. My husband finally threatened me with a Hello Kitty barrette. After that, I walked behind him.

Today I went back to my stylist and mentioned, ever so courteously (because she really is thebeststylistever and has always done a great job in the past), that my bangs were a bit too long and could we possibly do something about them.

I suppose I should have stopped her when she sat me in the chair and asked me, a little vaguely, whether I was sure I usually had short bangs. Um. Yeah. Pretty sure.

I know I should have stopped her when she started grabbing big hunks of hair from the top of my head and chopping them off, commenting the whole time, "I just don't see how this is going to work." Which, by the way, is a close runner-up for my Top Five list.

It wasn't until she stopped chopping and glared at my head for a while that she finally asked me how she usually cuts my hair. Maybe it's just me, but I kind of think that's the sort of question that should come before the scissors, not after. Especially when the answer is "much longer on the top and not feathered." And it was at this point that she let loose with the above exclamation, which pretty much stunned me into silence for the remainder of the visit.

On the plus side, I no longer look like Carol Brady, circa 1975. On the minus side, I now look a whole lot like Pat Benatar, circa 1985. In fact, I look a whole lot like me, circa 1985, except without the parachute pants and the jacket with all the zippers. Which I suppose is some small consolation.

But since my hair is now roughly four inches too short on top, there's really not much I can do about it until it grows out. In a few months, I'm going to shoot for Meg Ryan, circa 1995. Eventually I should make it back to this millennium.

Anyone know any good hat patterns?


heidi said...

Yes the 80's is coming back, and it looks like you are one of the forerunners:s

how terrible to have a months of bad hair days coming up:s

I really do hope your hair will grow super fast time time:)

sophanne said...

Are you really going to post this and not give us a photo? Besides we can make you feel better.

Anonymous said...

so sorry to hear that! I hate going to a stylist. I am never satisfied with what they do. Start taking some b vitamins....maybe the hair will grow out quicker

suzanne said...

Ha!! My haircutter lady called me and said she quit. I said what do you mean you quit? Needless to say, my hair is getting long and I need to find someone new.

Check out Wurm. Its a hat on Ravelry. And you gotta post a picture. I'll bet its not that bad!

Sharon said...

Yes, picture please! C'mon, hit us with your best shot. :)

Sorry--couldn't resist.

caknitter said...

oh no! I hate when that happens. I hope you didn't pay her again.
Just keep telling yourself that it will all grow back. :-)

caknitter said...

I just read what vanfox23 wrote and she's right about the vitamins...also take folic acid supplements; it supposed to help hair...I think. :-)

Maureen said...

As my oh so understanding mother said to me when I was an awkward teenager .... "what's the difference between a bad haircut and a good haircut? About three weeks." Hope it grows quickly for you.

Lydee said...

ugh! here's to hoping it grows quickly!

SusanJane said...

Hey, it's hat season, and here's your license to get some yummy cashmere or something and indulge in some cool hats!
And yeah, we really need a picture, even if it's just to make us feel grateful it's not us.

Fibra Artysta said...

I cringed through the whole post...what a nightmare. Its hard to believe that since she's cut your hair before she would make such a mistake, not once but twice! Maybe there was some vodka in her morning coffee...

Life's a Stitch said...

Someone once told me there's only three weeks between a bad haircut and a good one. Hope it goes fast for you ;-)